I got a call tonight from a friend visiting the Yellowstone Park. Amazing! Fabulous! he said. In a ranger-guided tour he could enjoy geysers, Grand Canyon, Lakes while looking for bears, wolves in the mountains and elks and buffaloes in the valleys.
I didn't fail to warn him of the danger. I told him that last Friday a chum of mine had been gulped down there on the spot by a grizzly bear. ... There was a stop on the phone, he kept quiet for quite a while.
“Hi there”, I said.
Then he went on: “Come to think of it. I saw an ad on a noticeboard at the East Entrance about a grizzly bear surgery. “
“Really? “ I said.
“They are looking for a surgery team. The bear has to undergo a special delivery surgery at the clinic of Mammoth where the board-certified physicians are not qualified for such special surgery.”


Enough learned! I right up mailed the clinic for information.


A man going by the name of Cheeter was swallowed by a grizzly bear on Friday Feb 27. The bear was soon captured and X-rayed. Although the grizzly bear is carnivorous, it seems it swallowed the man without chewing him up. Nobody knows why but the pictures show him quietly busy with his iPhone inside his cozy cocoon. The vet staff decided it was necessary the bear be operated. It'll be a first for surgery! Yes indeed, a wolf underwent such a vet surgery in 1825 when the grandmother of a Little Red Riding Hood was pulled alive from the wolf's belly. But with a bear it'll be a first of first. Given the special facilities needed on that purpose, the surgery is planned for March 27.


To be hired:
1 anesthetist vet
1 anesthetist MD
1 surgeon vet
1 surgeon MD
6 blond operating theatre nurses
1 operator iPhone qualified to keep in touch with cheeter during the operation
1 psychologist
1 bear keeper
1 cameraman
1 radio reporter to broadcast live the event
a dozen of blond cheerleaders to welcome the man at the doorstep of the theatre room.


Who will financially back the surgery, that's unsaid so far but rumor has it that it'll be the Delavigne Corporation the sales of which are expected to get a boost from the event.


Anyway all drugs and anesthetics for the bear as for the man will be provided by Horatio's labs in SF.


Applications are to be posted on Mammothclinic@yellowstone.com